My Brief Attempt at Survivor

Today, our church had a ladies' tea. The weather was very cool, cloudy and drizzly, but still a great day for time with sweet sisters! My sweet friend Casey picked me up, and of course, I was rushing, so I yelled bye to my sweetie, and ran out the door. As soon as I got to the Tea, I realized that I didn't have my cell phone, but that was no big deal. I didn't figure anyone was going to need me. The tea was so fun and inspirational. Sweet singing and a lovely speaker.

So as we arrive back at my house I realize my guy has left and I don't have my keys...'cause they were sitting right by the front door where I left them as I ran out. I told Casey it wasn't any big deal 'cause the spare key was in the storage building and I could just walk around there and get it. She offered to wait, but I said, "Don't be silly. I'll be fine."

You see where this is going, right?

As I enter the backyard, I realize there is a huge lock on the door of the storage building. I really wanted to be mad at my husband, but seriously, HE didn't leave my keys and phone in the house!!!! So then I start trying to figure out what to do. Option 1: Go to a neighbor's house, borrow the phone, call Chelsea and/or Jimmy. Option 2 - Call Casey to come back and get me. Option 3 - Wait for someone to come home.

Now here is the problem with Option 1 - typically when those two see a number they don't know they don't always answer. Actually, Jimmy will answer more often than Chelsea. She absolutely never answers a number she doesn't know. So if that occurred, I would be at a neighbor's house who, because they are kind, would insist on me just waiting at their house. So then I would have ruined their Saturday afternoon because they would have felt all obligated to entertain me until someone came to my rescue. Plus, depending on which neighbor was home (Is anyone ever home on Saturday afternoon? I mean really - probably not.), it could have been that real awkward weird thing of trying to make conversation in a forced situation.

The problem with option 2 is similar to the ruination issue with option 1 - I didn't want Casey and her crew to have to change their plans to accommodate her goofy friend.

So Option 3 was left. Now being resourceful and all, the first thing I tried was getting into my car, but of course, I was diligent and locked it last night. Sooo....now what? I walked around the yard for a minute feeling a little like Pooh when he would tap his head and say, "Think. Think. Think." Now mind you I was so smart to wear closed toed cute little flats to the tea, but had worn very stylish crops and a top with a short sleeved sweater over it so I was beginning to feel a little chilly. Now before you think, 'why not just sit at your patio table?' I will just remind you that it had been RAINING!!!! So all the chairs were very wet. Luckily the rain had stopped 'cause that might have pushed me right over the edge. So I thought, well, I guess I'll just have to go around in the front and sit on the front porch bench...looking like an idiot with my purse and umbrella. But then, SHAZAM!! I remembered there were the fold-up, in-a-bag, camping-kind of chairs in a big storage container thingy on the side of the house. When I opened up the lid - SHAZAM!!! - a blanket! Should I tell you that it was one we used for the dog...so it had hair and grass on it? Nah, that's too yuck to tell you.

So anyhoo...I set up my little chair and covered up with my blanket and waited. Then, SHAZAM!! I realized I had my Scripture cards in my purse. So Jesus and I sat on my back patio and He wrote His Word on my heart for a while - LIKE AN HOUR!!! Only problem - I think He was warm. I wasn't.

So, then I remembered that I could actually break into my minivan, aka. The Mom-Mobile. You see the side doors will open even if it's locked but it sets the alarm off (useful locks, huh?). Hmmm...the alarm would go off. I decided I didn't care. So that's what I did. I walked around to the drivers' side, and dadgum it!!! That door won't open. I was a little disgusted, but I decided to try the other door. I walked around to the passenger's side, pulled on the door, and YIPPEE - THE HORN STARTED HONKING...REALLY LOUDLY...but the door was open!!! I reached up and unlocked the front door, then reached in and across to unlock the driver's door. I closed the back door, and the alarm went off.

I went back into the back yard to clean up my campground and then went back to the van. I reached and opened the door. THE HORN STARTED HONKING!!! LOUDLY!!!!- AGAIN!!! So I jumped in and tried several things to get it to stop. Nothing I did worked, but eventually it stopped on its own. Now earlier in the week, I had worn some cute little shoes that required socks, but took my sandals for later in the day. SHAZAM!!! My socks were still in the van. Oh, my feet were soooo happy when I slid them on.

At this point we are an hour and a half into my adventure. I am looking around thinking how nice it was to be out of the wind and how dirty my van is on the inside when SHAZAM!!! Didn't McKenna ask me if I had gotten her phone out of the back seat? NO I HAD NOT!!!! I climbed to the back, and when I looked and saw that sweet little blue piece of technological heaven, I think I heard the Hallelujah Chorus!!! Now, this little phone is of the pre-paid variety as we let McKenna develop and demonstrate her responsibility - she only had 12 cents left. One minute is 20 cents, but you know what? SHAZAM!! I have a debit card!! I reloaded the phone, called Chelsea and waited...Oh, and I asked Chelsea to come through the house and get my keys so that she could not only let me in my house but she could also let me out of my car - by unlocking it so the alarm wouldn't go off.

I'm not trying out for Survivor. My backyard was tough enough.

By the way, did I mention that last Sunday morning, McKenna and I rushed out of the house to get to church and as I shut the door, I heard the click and realized...yep, I locked my keys in the house. Luckily I had a phone that time. Do you see a pattern developing? I hope not. 'Cause if each incident is successively worse...I could end up locked out again...no keys...no phone...no clothes.

Oh, Lord, save me from myself.